Have you ever left a job interview convinced you completely blew it, only to receive an offer the next day? Have you been to a party where everyone seems to be busy engaging with other people, just not you. You feel like they have no interest in getting to know you, in being your friend. Both these examples demonstrate cognitive distortions – those sneaky mental tricks that can lead us astray and cloud our judgment.
These irrational or negative thought patterns make us perceive reality inaccurately. While everyone experiences these from time to time, frequent engagement with these thought patterns can negatively affect mental health, relationships and overall well-being.
In this post, we'll explore what cognitive distortions are, dive into some common types, and offer strategies to help recognise and overcome them.
Let's explore some of the most prevalent cognitive distortions:
Focusing solely on the negatives while ignoring positives.
Example: Fixating on one criticism in an otherwise positive performance review.
Viewing situations in "all-or-nothing" terms.
Example: Thinking, "If I don't get an A, I'm a total failure."
Drawing broad conclusions from a single event.
Example: "I got rejected for one job, so I'll never find employment."
Dismissing positive experiences as unimportant.
Example: "Sure, I did well on that presentation, but anyone could have done that."
Making negative interpretations without supporting evidence.
Example: Assuming a friend is angry with you because they haven't returned your text.
Expecting the worst possible outcome in every scenario.
Example: "If I'm late to this meeting, I'll surely get fired."
Taking responsibility for external events beyond your control.
Example: Blaming yourself for your child's poor grades.
Feeling either completely responsible for everything or believing you have no control at all.
Example: "I can't help being late; traffic is always terrible."
Measuring every situation against your own sense of fairness.
Example: "It's not fair that they got promoted before me."
Making others responsible for your emotions.
Example: "You make me feel so stupid when you correct me."
Holding rigid rules about how you and others should behave.
Example: "I should always be productive; taking breaks means I'm lazy."
Believing something is true because it "feels" true.
Example: "I feel like a bad parent, so I must be one."
Expecting others will change to suit your needs if you pressure them enough.
Example: Constantly nagging a partner to be more outgoing.
Defining yourself or others based on a single event or characteristic.
Example: Making a mistake at work and labeling yourself as "incompetent."
Prioritising being right over everything else, including others' feelings.
Example: Continuing an argument even when you see it's upsetting the other person.
Cognitive distortions are a natural part of the human experience, but they don't have to control your life. By learning to identify and challenge these thought patterns, you can develop a more balanced, realistic perspective. Remember, changing thought habits takes time and practice. Be patient with yourself as you work towards healthier thinking patterns.
Stay mindful, stay balanced, and remember – your thoughts shape your reality, but you have the power to shape your thoughts!